Swimming in an ocean of thoughts.....

Ask me no questions and i shall tell you no lies :)

Friday, March 14, 2014

The homemaker’s perspective ~ From a nomad’s diary

Morning: 8 AM

Husband (getting ready for office): Hey! Did you see my watch?

Wife: Yeah, just a minute, as she slides of a steaming puran poli in her son’s tiffin box. And then, she goes searching for the watch which could possibly be anywhere in the house, but at her husband’s study table where it ideally should be.

Husband: Hey! I am getting late! Never mind, I got my watch! Now, where are my specs?

Wife (still thinking, where the watch could have been):yeah, am searching.....

Son wakes up and enters the scene, Maaaaaa.........Maaaaaa....... With his tiny hands up in the air, groggy eyed toddler tugs at the mother gesturing her to pick him up.

Mother: One minute my munchkin! Am searching for your father’s specs..... (usually it is seen lying in the bed underneath a pillow)

She continues searching when she sees him turning the study room upside down, frantically searching for his specs. She quips, Hey you are wearing them!

Husband (with a discomfited look): Ok! Ok! Such things happen all the time! By the way, did I tell you, I am not able to find my wallet and car keys!

Wife (looking at her teary eyed toddler): Hey why don't you brush your teeth and wash your face until I get your glass of milk ready.....Bournvita!!"

And, after some extensive searching, she promptly gives him the car keys and wallet, after having found them in his one of his many track pants that were strewn all over the bed, that was made just an hour ago. And she reminds him as usual, “Hey listen, when you come back, make sure you write the complaint for the leaking tap.”

Husband (mumbling, as he takes a breakfast bite): Why don’t you do it? You are the home maker! You have the time too. My hands are full. Ok! bye!”

Wife (nodding her head in resignation): Oh yeah! Bye as she gets her son ready for school.

The above morning conversation is something that most (if not all) home makers face on a daily basis, more than the job-goers (not necessarily the way the above conversation sounds). All the running, screaming and multitasking becomes a routine for the lady of the house. She is one indispensable entity on whom, her world depends for everything and yet, her job is most underrated. In short, her job is a no salary, no vacation (leave aside, paid or unpaid) job, for which she demands only love, care and sensitivity as her reward.

I never really valued a home maker until I became one myself. Yes, I have been grossly arrogant at a time, when I had decided for one, that I am never going to be one of those who would be sitting at home, tending to household chores and needs of family. It was about four years back, when I was a working woman, and then, just engaged. And now, with my world complete, with a son and a loving husband, perceptions have changed.  Not forgetting to mention, there is a strange feeling about it. We tend to agree on things we vehemently disagreed on, way back and, strongly object to certain ways of life, which we ourselves followed religiously at one time. That said, we become more sensitive to people around and realize our strengths and weakness in a much better way. And, a lady realizes as a home maker that it is not just about money earned and spent, but it is about respect towards a job and respect earned from it. Most importantly, she experiences the truth, being a home maker is no child's play!!

And now, as I start with “Confessions of a home maker”, women sailing in my boat will totally relate to it. Have been one, for three years, ever since I quit my job, the experience is nonetheless challenging. And, here is a home maker’s perspective for people who think, it is not something to be proud of!!
  • No matter what you do, there will not be a moment when you can sit and sigh, “aaah! Work over! Time for a siesta”
  • At any point of time, the sink is always going to be quarter-full or half-full or three quarter full or full or overflowing. And why not? Breakfast, preparing lunch, a eleven o clock tea break, four o clock tea break with snacks, Haiti for occasional guest visits, dinners followed by supper, are just the known ones in the routine.
  • Then, there is housekeeping that demands that, curtains be of the right shade, the hall must be all inviting, dining table with appropriate cutlery and cloth napkins.
  • There are always going to be guests, irrespective of which time of the day it is. So, she has to be prepared with a stock of snacks (readymade or handmade)
  • Then, there is the laundry. Although, washing machines are a saving grace for today’s homemaker (unlike the previous generation who did all by themselves), the drying and folding part is still an exhausting task. And if it has to be done everyday!
  • The beds have to be made more often than not. No matter how hard she tries keeping the beds clean with pillows and comforters in the right place, it doesn't remain the same way for long. Needless to say, with children, it is a nearly impossible task.
  • And then, there are groceries, fruits and vegetables to be bought. Being the home minister of her home, she drives her sedan flawless to any corner of the city to get the best stuff in nominal rates. And then, there are bills to be paid too.
  • With a dog at home, she has to walk it too. She is his master and he is her friend, the one who is a sole witness to her endlessly busy routine.
  • Also, from her routine, a part goes solely for the children, attending their to their (extra)curricular activities.
  • If she were lucky enough to get some time for herself, she watches news or maybe, a soap on Comedy central or any cooking show aired on TLC.  Or maybe, she would spend her time doing some yoga and meditation.
There is no end to the list above. The tasks are too many to list. But notwithstanding all that, a modern day homemaker carries out her tasks with aplomb, besides being the educated lady with myriad hobbies, she rarely gets to pursue. Sometimes, she is also one of those who has a flair for business and part time jobs from home. Yet, family comes first and she is the anchor to whom the family clings.

8 PM (Evening)

Husband: Hey, don’t make anything..... Want to take you out for a movie and then dinner....... What say??”
Wife: (No words, just tears of joy)

That is all a homemaker needs once in a while!! After all, a home maker is the backbone of a healthy home, a happy home!!



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